The Science of Getting Unstuck
You’ve been an athlete your whole life. A master of the game, the queen of the court, the hero of the field. And now, the cheering has faded, the uniform is folded, and the bright lights have dimmed. Suddenly, you’re here, standing at the crossroads of “what was” and “what’s next,” feeling more stuck than you ever felt during the toughest game.
Getting stuck feels like an immovable object. It feels like a standstill. But here’s the truth: Being stuck is a state of mind, not a state of being. It’s not a verdict, but rather, it’s an invitation. An invitation to take a closer look, to dig deeper, to recalibrate, and to pivot. You’re not lost. You’re just at the beginning of something new.
Here’s how you can get unstuck and move forward with grace, purpose, and confidence.
1. Recognize the Stuckness
You feel it, don’t you? The unease, the uncertainty, the way your feet feel glued to the ground. But here’s the thing: you have to recognize it to change it. Label it. Call it out.
Write it down: “I feel stuck because…”
Understand that this is a natural feeling. Science calls it “the ambiguity effect,” where our brains are wired to avoid uncertainty. The good news? Awareness is the first step toward transformation. By naming your stuckness, you’re shining a light on it, making it less daunting, less of a monster in the closet.
2. Shift the Narrative
The stories we tell ourselves shape our reality. Are you telling yourself, “I’m no longer an athlete, so who am I?” Let’s rewrite that script. Shift the narrative from what you’re leaving behind to what you’re moving towards.
Try this: “I am evolving. My skills, discipline, and resilience as an athlete are now being redirected to a new challenge.” It’s not about forgetting your past. It’s about integrating it into a broader, richer narrative of your life.
Your identity isn’t tied solely to your sport. It’s in your dedication, your work ethic, your ability to lead and inspire. Those are your superpowers. Think of your athletic career as Chapter One of a book that’s just getting started. What will Chapter Two be about?
3. Engage the Power of Tiny Habits
Science shows us that big changes come from small, consistent actions. This is the heart of the “Tiny Habits” method developed by BJ Fogg. Instead of overwhelming yourself with the need for a giant leap, start with a step.
Want to explore a new career? Start by dedicating just five minutes a day to researching industries that pique your interest. Curious about what it feels like to be a coach or mentor? Reach out to one person in your network and ask them about their experience. Tiny actions accumulate, and before you know it, you’re no longer stuck—you’re moving.
4. Leverage Your Community
Being a part of a team is in your DNA. Just because you’re leaving the field doesn’t mean you’re leaving your team. Identify your new tribe. Maybe it’s a group of fellow retired athletes. Perhaps it’s a professional network or a community based on a hobby you love.
Humans are wired for connection. Social neuroscience shows us that community support is crucial for mental health and resilience. Find your team. Lean on them. You don’t have to do this alone.
5. Embrace the Power of ‘Yet’
Psychologist Carol Dweck introduced us to the concept of the “growth mindset.” When you’re stuck, add the word “yet” to your self-talk. “I haven’t found my passion, yet.” “I’m not sure what my next step is, yet.”
Yet is a powerful word. It implies potential, openness, and possibility. It reminds you that your journey is not over, that the answer is out there, waiting for you to discover it.
6. Take Imperfect Action
Perfectionism is the enemy of progress. It’s easy to stay stuck when you’re waiting for the perfect idea, the perfect opportunity, the perfect moment. Here’s the secret: there is no perfect. There’s only action and feedback.
Take one imperfect step forward. Then another. Adjust as you go. Think of it as running drills. You didn’t master your sport by sitting on the sidelines. You got out there, you practiced, you learned, and you improved. Life is no different.
7. Create Your Own Playbook
Athletes thrive on routines, on game plans, on clear goals. Create your own playbook for this next chapter. Set daily intentions, weekly goals, and long-term visions. But remember, this isn’t about rigidly following a path. It’s about having a guide, a framework that gives you direction while allowing for flexibility.
Life, like sport, is unpredictable. Your playbook is there to keep you focused, to remind you of your goals, and to help you pivot when necessary.
The Final Whistle
Getting unstuck isn’t about a magical solution; it’s about movement, even when the direction isn’t entirely clear. It’s about trusting the process, believing in your capability, and knowing that every experience, including feeling stuck, is part of your evolution.
Remember, you were never just an athlete. You were a dreamer, a doer, a believer. That hasn’t changed. The game may be different, but your skills are the same. The world is your new arena, and it’s waiting for you to make your move.
You’ve got this. Now go out there and play.